I bought those pants (I did not need pants). Athleta is a certified B Corp.
The women behind me are planning a trip to Florida. Destin. Or maybe St. Ann’s Island. Husbands welcome. Why have I never heard of St. Ann’s Island? Probably because it doesn’t exist. The woman talking is not sure about the name and I think she might mean Anna Maria Island. I haven’t heard of that either. I am not invited, but I wouldn’t go. I object to Florida’s politics in general and last week Florida’s Attorney General announced that they won’t engage law firms with sustainability or DEI programs. I am spectacularly uninterested in giving them any of my money.
If you hadn’t heard already, white men already have a leg up and have had one for a long time. Being anti-DEI is just gross. The last time I checked, conspicuous consumption has also had a good run. We’ve tried that too. Good Lord. Is the Florida AG checking the offices of firms to see if they have recycling bins?1
If your place of employment has not discussed this yet first of all yes they have (just not with you) and second of all it reaches us all. I am not a person who makes this kind of call for my employer, but I can tell you we are all talking about it. Job applicants are asking about it. Clients are asking abut it. My therapist told me her potential clients are even asking her where she stands on politics, a thing that has not happened to her before.
Mike fell in love with a woman who always had reusable bags, went out of her way to use the revolving door (better for the environment), and had been boycotting Walmart for over a decade. It’s a little harder to boycott Walmart in Elizabeth, where your choices are Walmart or Safeway. No Target, no Lowe’s, no Home Depot. Not even a King Soopers.2 Also, Mike did not have the same scruples. So while he did shop at Target more once we were together, he would still go to Walmart on the sly. But that’s not what he called it.
Me, suspiciously: “Did you get that at Walmart?”
Mike, in his deep, confident, salesman voice: “No baby! This is from Schmalmart!”
Schmalmart is where the car battery, ice cream maker, and air mattress came from. They all appeared while I was at work, from a store that was not really Walmart but sounded suspiciously similar. This is what compromise looks like when a practical bargain hunter marries a determined idealist.
The summer Mike was dying, Abigail and her husband stayed with us for a month. Mike and Abigail would sneak out to Chik-Fil-A under the same mysterious circumstances. It’s because I boycott that too. I told him the waffle fries tasted like bigotry. Being married to me is not actually as easy as it looks.
And it’s possibly getting harder. I already boycotted Hobby Lobby (a no-brainer), and had zero interest in giving Elon Musk a penny of my money. But now I don’t feel so great about Target and Amazon either. And earlier this year King Soopers employees were on strike. Thank God for Costco.
Two things:
I don’t actually do this thinking it makes a difference to Walmart, or Chik-Fil-A. Or Florida.
I don’t judge Mike, or you, for shopping at Schmalmart.3
These distinctions are really important, at least to me. I’m not interested in telling you where to shop or vacation. I do think the cumulatively, it absolutely makes a difference. When a lot of us vote with our dollars, there are consequences. Like this. And in the alternative reality where the love of my life is still alive, there are probably new towels from Schmarget and a replacement part for a broken appliance ordered from Schmamazon. But I believe I’d draw the line at a getaway to Schmorida Keys because this can only go so far.
I do this because it matters to me where my money goes. I want to feel good about where I spend it. I also, perhaps unfortunately, like to buy stuff sometimes.4 And you would think, given these do-gooder sensibilities, that I was the thrifter. Nope. That was Mike, and that’s why we had a grill from Craigslist and an early 2000s snowman from a garage sale.5 I always wonder why I would want someone’s junk they are trying to get rid of. Mike wanted the junk they were getting rid of. He told me I was marrying the cheapest man alive, but this wasn’t true - he just had a different value, and not a wrong one either. There was always money for bouquets of roses that eventually died - and steak. But he tried to avoid buying something full price that he could get for much less. How sustainable! I try to buy good quality things that last forever and won’t be in a landfill next summer. How sustainable!
Meanwhile, we are all just trying to get by in an upside down world - where diversity and sustainability are somehow, ridiculously, bad words - and a crazy economy. My colleague said she checked her 401K out of curiosity, and I still haven’t looked. It was mostly easy to give up Walmart all those years ago because I never liked being in there anyway. Are you ever glad you have gone in Walmart? Target already made me sad, because Mike and I went there together so often. Survive this how you can. And if you can spend your money in a place you feel good about spending it - maybe think about doing that.
But how I still love that man who shopped at Schmalmart.
I guess that’s better than checking for people of color or gay people. How did we even get here?
That’s Kroger to you non-Colordans
but I do love my husband for calling it Schmalmart in deference to my liberal sensibilities
a complete understatement
Mike and my mom (who loved garage sales just as much) are probably at one right now. I am trying to decide whether my mom would be more impressed that he really loved her daughter or that he once got a refrigerator for ten bucks. Likely a toss up.